Showing posts with label Chores. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chores. Show all posts

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Procrastination In Children

My children have procrastination down to a fine science. It has gotten so bad that I finally decided I had to take drastic action! Yesterday morning I called a meeting with the kids after breakfast. I informed them that we were not going to start school work immediately, instead we were going to talk. I explained to the children that they have gotten very negligent in their chores and that schedules are not being kept and that we are all running ourselves ragged meeting deadlines unprepared.

I pulled out a paper and told the kids that they were going to help me figure out a way to make our schedule work for all of us. The first thing I wanted to address was our Thursday and Friday schedules. On those two days we do not have morning classes and the kids seem to treat those mornings as a Saturday morning. They want to sit around in their pajamas and take their good old time eating breakfast and getting ready for the day.

Somehow morning cartoons have once again crept into that morning time. So the new rule is now really an old rule revisited. No one is allowed to turn the TV on until after 4 pm. The children complained that they couldn't wake up and get started immediately on their work. So we brainstormed and this is what we came up with. They must be up by 8 am and be ready to start their school work by 9 am. Eight in the morning is still a late hour to them and they feel like they've gotten to sleep in. The other three days a week they have to be up by 7am so we can get to classes.

Between 8 and 9 the kids have to clean their rooms, get dressed and eat breakfast. We then made a list of things they could do if they finished early. With the kids help we put together this list: Reading, painting, clay, computer, typing, sewing, Lego's, tanagrams, trampoline, basketball.

To facilitate the other three mornings of the week the children now have to lay out all their stuff the night before. This involves more than you would initially think. On Sunday night they have to lay out the required uniform for their martial arts class, their clothes for school and Peter has to get his basketball uniform laid out. Tink has to make sure she has her violin and her book ready to go.

On Monday night they have to lay out the required clothes for the Christian Academy. That involves polo shirts and solid color pants and skirt for Tink. Because Tink has PE there she has to lay out her culottes.

On Tuesday night they lay out their martial arts clothes, their clothes they are going to wear for the day, and Peters basketball uniform again. Once again Tink has to make sure her violin and book are ready. Wednesday night they need to again prepare clothes for the Christian Academy. Vests and shirts for Awana along with their Awana books have to be gotten around and laid out on the table in their rooms. Besides the clothes they have to get the books around every night that they will need for Academy classes. Its a lot for kids to remember but it's totally imperative that this be done in order for our mornings to go more smoothly.

Mornings were becoming a rat race and I was tired of getting ready to leave only to discover that one or both of the kids couldn't find something. In trying to get more organized it became quickly apparent that I would need to purchase a few things to help this go more smoothly. I bought Tink a back pack so she could carry her books separately from Peters. I rounded up another white erase board and wrote the days classes on them and to which school we were going to be going to each day. Both kids already have their list of weekly assignments for their classes at home.

Chore lists were tackled in our breakfast meeting. The chore chart is working well but Tink thinks Peter needs more chores and Peter thinks he has way more than any other boy his age. In discussing this I discovered that Peter was feeling overwhelmed with his chores and school work. It's no wonder, poor boy. He's getting introduced to school at home and its a far cry from his days of boarding a bus and spending the entire day at a public school.

I realized Peter needed some help. So we discussed how to break his chores into smaller chunks. To prevent him from putting off his chores we are now setting a timer for each portion of the job. We also identified the hated parts of the chores. I discovered that he didn't mind bringing in the wood but he hated how dirty and cold his hands got. That's why he kept putting off the job. That was easily remedied by a pair of gloves. He didn't like putting his trucks on the shelves because they continually rolled off. Now Mr. Darling is going to put little tabs on the shelves so the trucks stay in place. Actually I know that frustration. I've had the same thing happen to me when I've tried to organize the trucks.

Peter said that when I sent him in to clean his room he didn't know where to start. My children's rooms are never messy as kids rooms go. Its usually just a few toys left out and his clothes from the day before thrown around. So we worked out a plan where he would gather all dirty clothes first, then move to trucks, then to any Legos, then on to straightening the toy shelves and lastly dusting his table and windowsills. His cleaning zone includes the upstairs family room so we broke that into small chunks too.

After we identified the hated parts I told the kids I would help them the first several times through. Tink doesn't seem to have any problems in this area. She loves cleaning and rarely complains when it comes time to clean her zone. Both kids told me they were frustrated with their Tae Kwon Do uniforms because they didn't know where to put them! They were right. I hadn't designated a spot for them.

Charting and planning are an essential part of every day. Organization is not an option. Its highly necessary to get through a day around here. The list of activities for morning time are on the white board by the computer. The days list of classes are on the white board in Tinks room. Beside the computer are papers for both kids; forms from Alliance Academy that need filled out for Technology. Every time the kids use technology for study they have to write it down; V for video, C for computer, I for Internet, A for Audio. The website of video or what ever they have used needs to be listed on the same line with the date and how much time was spent in the activity.

Tink fills out another sheet for every time she practices violin and for how long. They each record choir classes and any performances they have had that week.

Paper work is done for each child on their activities. Again there are abbreviations for the different sports and activities. P just simply means out door play time, T is trampoline, BB is basketball, V is volley ball, etc. There are about 10 different letters for all the activities. All these papers need filled out daily and handed to the ES once a month.

When I finally set down and figured all this out it dawned on me why I have been feeling like we are racing through our days unable to catch up! With a tight schedule we cant allow anything to slip through the cracks.

To come to this sort of organized day I had to ask myself a few questions. Why are the kids putting off what they are suppose to be doing? Why are they not prepared? What can we do to prepare in advance for each day? Do I need to implement a reward system? What will be the outcome if chores are not completed in a timely fashion? What happens if we get to a class and they don't have the right books or clothes for the class? What can I do to make things easier for the kids? Do they fully understand what their jobs are? Do they know how to do them?

I was amazed at how helpful the kids were in identifying the problem areas. They really got involved in the brain storming and in telling me how they felt about things. This morning I heard Tinks alarm go off. I was amazed when immediately afterward I heard her feet hit the floor. Within seconds she was in the shower and her day had begun. Peter was a little slower but much better than he had been the day before.

So now we'll see how this next week goes. Hopefully we all find a bit more sanity to our day! To help pinpoint the problem and to identify ways to change it I read the book, "The Procrastinating Child" by Rita Emmett. I found it at the library and Im about half way through it. I highly recommend it. It has been a life saver around here.
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Friday, April 18, 2008

Questions we need to ask ourselves

Somebody asked me why I no longer post pics of craft projects and things my kids are doing in homeschool. The big reason there are no pics is because my husband needs to reroute my camera through the computer rather then the copy machine! And the reason there are no crafts to show you even if the camera was hooked up correctly is because we no longer do a lot of crafts.

This past week Tink and Peter have hidden behind the closed school room door making something for me for mothers day. I find glitter and snippets of yarn and pipe cleaner lying around as result, so yeah, they still do those kinds of crafts.

What we do not do anymore is the craft that is incorporated in our school day. Two years ago when I began to homeschool I had a 9 year old and a 5 year old. They loved to paint and make a mess. But now Tink is 11. She is in fifth grade. She is no longer interested so much in cutting and gluing. The school work has taken on an intensity and a life of its own.

Peter is going to school at the state charter school so he is not being homeschooled anymore. When he gets home its already 4:30 pm and four of the five evenings we turn around and head back out the door by 5:30 for swimming lessons and piano lessons. Before swimming it was basketball! The poor little boy no longer has time to do crafts at home.

When children are small there is much value to crafts. They need to learn to use a scissors and how to glue. Crafts teach them about dimension; planes verses solids. Crafts teach motor dexterity both small motor and gross motor control. Crafts also help to fill in the endless time that a young child has in their day. It keeps them occupied.

With a fifth grader those things are already learned and there is no extra time for cutting and pasting. I realize some children still love this at 11 but the value of it is pretty much a thing of the past. By 11 years old kids are doing crafts only if something really catches their interest. Around this age you also see that the beads the children once messed around with are now taking real shape and real things are being made and sold to friends; necklaces, wrist and ankle bracelets, key chains, etc. In other words kids are no longer crafting for the joy of crafting, in that the paper filled with glitter that hits the wastebasket is no longer their thing. They need meaning behind what they do and a reason to do it.

So then what does Tinks day look like? It looks like school for a child about to enter Junior High. Oh yes, I hear the outcry to make home a learning environment and I would say ours is but we do set aside a definite time to do school work too. Tink needs to know school has a beginning and an ending. All kids are different but this is how Tink operates.

We are reaching the end of our books. We've started a new book in Math. We are still notebooking our History. Tink is doing research on monkeys right now. I have no idea why she chose monkeys. When I put the idea out there for a research report I suggested things like; children in other lands, birds, trees, seasons, etc. But she wanted to research monkeys! This is the second research paper she has done this year. The first one was on giraffes. Tink loves animals!

I'm not going to start a new phonics book right now. Tink is finishing up Abeka's Letters and Sounds. Instead, through May we are going to focus more on reading for fluency. In June she will start the next phonics book because its worksheets and those she can do on her own without much input from me. In June I am busy with outside work so this will work well for us.

Tink does a lot of school work in a days time but I'm still pushing for more. Success is not achieved without great effort. I want my children to be able to put in a good hard days work at whatever they are doing. When they are adults I want them to know how to put in a full day of hard labor.

I'm afraid we are raising a society of soft people, people who have no idea how to work with the sweat of their brow. I'm especially concerned for the wimpy little boys we are raising.

Let me leave you with food for thought over the weekend. Ask yourselves these questions:

Have my children ever put in such a long day of physical labor that their muscles have hurt at days end? Does that sound like child labor to you? Think about it. Do you think Abraham Lincoln knew what aching muscles were when he was a boy? What about Daniel Boone? Do you think he could have blazed a trail through the wilderness if he hadn't learned about hard work as a boy? He led thirty men with axes from Virginia to the middle of Kentucky! Do you think it was the first time he had ever wielded an axe?

Do my children know that a job worth doing is worth doing right? Do you let them get by with work that is half done or sloppily done?

Do my children know what is required of them in the home? Do you even have requirements for them?

Does my son know how to use the tools on the workbench that are acceptable for his age? Have Legos, Lincoln Logs, and Tinker Toys replaced wood, hammer, nails , and homemade levers and pulleys?

Have I ever seen sweat on my children from hard outdoor labor?

Does my son know better how to operate a remote control then a rake, hoe or shovel?

Has my daughter ever worked all day in the house with me?
Does she know how to transition smoothly from one job to the next?

Do my children know how to see a job and do it without me pointing it out?

If you have answered no to these questions then the next question has to follow; are you really and truly equipping your kids with skills for the future? Is your laid back approach to life, school and work, really going to prepare them for life outside your four walls?

This is just food for thought.
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