Im sitting here during Christmas break re-evaluating where we are going in our school work. I'm content where Peter is but Tink is giving me a run for my money. It's time to rethink; why do I homeschool? The number one reason is so my kids can get a Christian education. I could put them in our church school for that but then we run into reason number two; Tink has a processing disorder and the school is not equipped to deal with it. Since I need to homeschool Tink it only makes sense to homeschool Peter.
There now I have the basics down. I'm back to the bottom line. The bottom line is to teach the kids in the ways of the Lord, to teach them to walk in truth and righteousness. Tink is 14 years old today. Lots of reflection is going on in her mothers heart and mind.
I have decided that Tink is only going to do the bare minimum in school this year. Between orchestra classes and volleyball she has 17 hours of her week used up. The average child attends school 7 hours a day at the very most. There are five days in the school week; seven times five is 35. Thirty-five minus 17 is 18. So Tink has 18 hours in her week for other book learning. Five and a half of those 18 hours are spent in classes at the charter school. Another hour is spent in a meeting with a state academic rep. Another hour is spent in mandatory volunteer work at the Academy. That now leaves Tink with 10.5 hours during the normal school week day to focus on her homeschool studies. That breaks down to roughly 2 hours and 25 minutes a day. Lets take out that 25 minutes for lunch time and she has 2 hours a day to do her work.
In that 2 hours she has to do Math, Science, Reading and Grammar. That would basically leave just a half hour for every subject. That doesn't count the homework she needs to do from the classes she is taking at the Charter school. I have been figuring her day from 8-3 with a 25 minute break for lunch. Do you see the problem? There aren't enough hours in the day.
Now assuming you followed all those numbers you know why I am at my wits end with her curriculum and education. After much thought and prayer we will be going into the new year with less focus on anything that doesn't positively have to be done in her curriculum. I have spoken to her Education Specialist and we have decided to test her orally every six weeks through this year with a test that is set up for this purpose. This will tell me whether she is actually making progress or not.
I will let you know what the results of the testing are. If after the first 6 weeks of this year we do not see even the littlest improvement I will have to refigure everything. If I see improvement I will let things be.
So what's happening in your homeschool world? Any milestones reached? Is there anything you have been doing that you are going to stop for winter break? Share with us.
Showing posts with label Tink. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tink. Show all posts
Monday, December 27, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
Fall Semester in Retrospect
I have a minute this morning so I decided to drop in here and let you all know how the first semester has gone here at Blueberry House. As in any other year there have been false starts and finding out that a book or program is just not going to work the way Id like it too. But that is just par for the course. If you are a new homeschooler and that is happening to you, take heart. Even us seasoned homeschoolers and teachers get it wrong sometimes.
Peter has evolved through the last three months to where he now is doing everything but Math in Christian Light Education. He has a huge three ring binder that has file tabs in the right cover. Each one is labeled with a subject from CLE. His Lightunits (same thing as the old Paces) fit perfectly in the pockets. I broke down and bought the actual goal charts from CLE when I could just have easily designed my own but why reinvent the wheel? Right? I hole punch his goal chart and put it into the binder and off he goes. He can work almost independently. I have him read to me every day; one day he reads his Reading story and the next he reads his Social Studies to me. He reads all vocabulary words aloud to me and then he is on his own!
Tink is struggling. I am not so happy with how things are going with her. I need to just figure out what is most important this year and let the rest go. Her three most time consuming things are her orchestra classes, her volley ball and a writing class that she is participating in at the Charter School. I really wanted to focus on reading vocabulary this year and so far I have but she is really struggling with it. I have to figure out a better way to introduce it - a better way to fit it into her schedule.
She is now complaining about Teaching Textbooks. She claims its too hard. Did I make a mistake when I let her skip TT Grade 6 and go straight from Grade 5 into Grade 7? She tested at Grade 7 with there online tests but maybe with her processing problems I shouldn't have let her skip. I plan on taking the Christmas break to figure out what to do with her Math.
The Grammar Keys arent working for her like I'd hoped either. I have a little cricket on my shoulder that continues to chirp even though I try to kill it. What is it saying? Well listen. Here is what it says, "Tink has reached her limit. She cant learn any further. Nothing is working because she cant process more. She is academically DONE!"
I refuse to listen but I have niggling doubts that maybe she is reaching her limit with English Grammar. She wrote a novel for NaNoWriMo this month. She ended with 7,612 words and ten chapters. It was required for her writing class. She got an A+ for this semester but mama definitely had to take over the editing to keep the story on track. Now that the deadline has been met my goal is to take paragraphs for her own unedited writing of that story and use if for Writing Mechanics. There's nothing like fixing your own mistakes to speed up that learning curve.
So life goes on. I have 13 students now. I plan 60 lessons a week. I have 2 students in first grade, 2 in second grade, none in third, 3 in fourth, 1 in fifth, 3 in seventh, 1 in eighth and 1 in ninth. There is never a dull moment!
Tink has an all day volleyball tournament Monday and Tuesday. I am looking forward to taking Tuesday off to go watch her play.
So how does your first semester look in retrospect. Have you found something that is working great? Is there anything that hasn't worked? Share it with us.
Peter has evolved through the last three months to where he now is doing everything but Math in Christian Light Education. He has a huge three ring binder that has file tabs in the right cover. Each one is labeled with a subject from CLE. His Lightunits (same thing as the old Paces) fit perfectly in the pockets. I broke down and bought the actual goal charts from CLE when I could just have easily designed my own but why reinvent the wheel? Right? I hole punch his goal chart and put it into the binder and off he goes. He can work almost independently. I have him read to me every day; one day he reads his Reading story and the next he reads his Social Studies to me. He reads all vocabulary words aloud to me and then he is on his own!
Tink is struggling. I am not so happy with how things are going with her. I need to just figure out what is most important this year and let the rest go. Her three most time consuming things are her orchestra classes, her volley ball and a writing class that she is participating in at the Charter School. I really wanted to focus on reading vocabulary this year and so far I have but she is really struggling with it. I have to figure out a better way to introduce it - a better way to fit it into her schedule.
She is now complaining about Teaching Textbooks. She claims its too hard. Did I make a mistake when I let her skip TT Grade 6 and go straight from Grade 5 into Grade 7? She tested at Grade 7 with there online tests but maybe with her processing problems I shouldn't have let her skip. I plan on taking the Christmas break to figure out what to do with her Math.
The Grammar Keys arent working for her like I'd hoped either. I have a little cricket on my shoulder that continues to chirp even though I try to kill it. What is it saying? Well listen. Here is what it says, "Tink has reached her limit. She cant learn any further. Nothing is working because she cant process more. She is academically DONE!"
I refuse to listen but I have niggling doubts that maybe she is reaching her limit with English Grammar. She wrote a novel for NaNoWriMo this month. She ended with 7,612 words and ten chapters. It was required for her writing class. She got an A+ for this semester but mama definitely had to take over the editing to keep the story on track. Now that the deadline has been met my goal is to take paragraphs for her own unedited writing of that story and use if for Writing Mechanics. There's nothing like fixing your own mistakes to speed up that learning curve.
So life goes on. I have 13 students now. I plan 60 lessons a week. I have 2 students in first grade, 2 in second grade, none in third, 3 in fourth, 1 in fifth, 3 in seventh, 1 in eighth and 1 in ninth. There is never a dull moment!
Tink has an all day volleyball tournament Monday and Tuesday. I am looking forward to taking Tuesday off to go watch her play.
So how does your first semester look in retrospect. Have you found something that is working great? Is there anything that hasn't worked? Share it with us.
Friday, January 15, 2010
There really is nothing like homeschool
Today it was just the kids and I. We spent some intense time in the books. On Fridays I like to dig into the stuff that we cant hit during the rest of the week because of all the outside classes and the tutoring students coming and going.
A couple months ago I identified the crux of Tinks learning disabilities. Yes, she has a processing disorder but I wasn't content with just knowing that. After homeschooling her for four years I began to notice a pattern in both the state testing and the daily school work. I am now convinced that the problem lies in her vocabulary.
To help in this area I once again returned to Wordly Wise for help. To be able to define a word one must be able to pronounce it and then use it in context. Tink is having trouble with pronouncing words she reads. She can get the answers correct because the word is defined in the book and she can always check it's definition, but when I have her read me the list of the vocabulary words she cannot pronounce the words that she has been writing the definitions for.
Here are a few of the words in this weeks word list: conquer, crevice, assign, impatient, thwart, terse. Tink is 13 and she cant read these words. If she sees them in context in a story she does much better than just trying to read a word list, but when she is asked to define words on her state tests they are not in context. They are in list form and she fails it every time!
On Fridays we go over the words together...over and over and over...until she gets tired of going over them. We go over these same words throughout the week but on Friday we dig into the list and drill and drill. On Monday Tink does not know the words. But there is progress. She can read about half of them but that doesn't mean she will remember the definitions.
Wordly Wise goes over the words in many different ways including putting them in context in story form. Then the student does page after page of definitions. It's the best vocabulary program I know of.
I'm not worried about Tinks struggles with vocabulary. My heart goes out to her when I watch her trying to decipher the words but I know we will get through this just like we have gotten through everything else.
That's what I like about Fridays. We move from the school room upstairs into the downstairs living room. There by the fire we tackle the subjects that my kids struggle with the most. They are allowed to eat popcorn and drink hot chocolate while they work or to have their blankets and stuffed animals cuddled up next to them.
We don't worry about how far we get in the curriculum. We don't stress about getting all the subjects in for the day. If we stay on one page the entire time that is okay. We only work about two hours instead of the normal 6 hours on the other four days of the week but the work we do goes deep, deep into the content on the page!
For Peter it was all about preparing for Oregon Battle of the Books, which is the book club competition he is trying out for. He listened for over an hour to an audio of Gregor the Overlander while following along in the book. We then wrote out 40 questions about the material he had just read. Every little detail is fair game to the judges during the Battle of the Books.
I love days like this when we go deeper into the material then the time usually allows. I wish everyone knew the joy that comes from teaching your children at home! When you teach at home their entire education is in your hands. You can expose them to things they are interested in. You can work on their problem areas and help them soar in the areas they are gifted. It's an amazing, heady, yet humbling feeling.
A couple months ago I identified the crux of Tinks learning disabilities. Yes, she has a processing disorder but I wasn't content with just knowing that. After homeschooling her for four years I began to notice a pattern in both the state testing and the daily school work. I am now convinced that the problem lies in her vocabulary.
To help in this area I once again returned to Wordly Wise for help. To be able to define a word one must be able to pronounce it and then use it in context. Tink is having trouble with pronouncing words she reads. She can get the answers correct because the word is defined in the book and she can always check it's definition, but when I have her read me the list of the vocabulary words she cannot pronounce the words that she has been writing the definitions for.
Here are a few of the words in this weeks word list: conquer, crevice, assign, impatient, thwart, terse. Tink is 13 and she cant read these words. If she sees them in context in a story she does much better than just trying to read a word list, but when she is asked to define words on her state tests they are not in context. They are in list form and she fails it every time!
On Fridays we go over the words together...over and over and over...until she gets tired of going over them. We go over these same words throughout the week but on Friday we dig into the list and drill and drill. On Monday Tink does not know the words. But there is progress. She can read about half of them but that doesn't mean she will remember the definitions.
Wordly Wise goes over the words in many different ways including putting them in context in story form. Then the student does page after page of definitions. It's the best vocabulary program I know of.
I'm not worried about Tinks struggles with vocabulary. My heart goes out to her when I watch her trying to decipher the words but I know we will get through this just like we have gotten through everything else.
That's what I like about Fridays. We move from the school room upstairs into the downstairs living room. There by the fire we tackle the subjects that my kids struggle with the most. They are allowed to eat popcorn and drink hot chocolate while they work or to have their blankets and stuffed animals cuddled up next to them.
We don't worry about how far we get in the curriculum. We don't stress about getting all the subjects in for the day. If we stay on one page the entire time that is okay. We only work about two hours instead of the normal 6 hours on the other four days of the week but the work we do goes deep, deep into the content on the page!
For Peter it was all about preparing for Oregon Battle of the Books, which is the book club competition he is trying out for. He listened for over an hour to an audio of Gregor the Overlander while following along in the book. We then wrote out 40 questions about the material he had just read. Every little detail is fair game to the judges during the Battle of the Books.
I love days like this when we go deeper into the material then the time usually allows. I wish everyone knew the joy that comes from teaching your children at home! When you teach at home their entire education is in your hands. You can expose them to things they are interested in. You can work on their problem areas and help them soar in the areas they are gifted. It's an amazing, heady, yet humbling feeling.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Oh the Frustration
Okay, Ive had it! I'm going to write my own curriculum! I've thought about it for ages and now I know I'm going to have to bite the bullet and write it myself. . . . someday!
I cant find any good history or Social Studies out there! Yes, we are doing Story of The World but I want Tink doing more. One reason is that if she is reading from a SS book she is getting in extra reading and by doing a workbook I can better see how much she is comprehending what she is reading.
A child like Tink will not read two stories in her Reading book in one day. Her goal is not to learn and to work hard to progress academically. Her goal is to complete the lesson and call it good. So that being the case I have to sneak other reading in by way of other subjects so she doesn't catch on that it is really more of the same!
I pulled her out of the Reading in Christian Light Education and today I bought her the 5th grade Reading through Bob Jones. I pulled her out of the Social Studies through CLE but I don't like Bob Jones History at any level! Its odd cause I love Bob Jones otherwise. I just don't like their History. So it looks like I will have to find something on the Internet. I tell you, I really will write my own someday. You just watch me!
I ordered Social Studies, Reading and Language Arts from CLE for Tink this year. The only things she is still in is LA. I ordered Reading, Language Arts, Science and Bible for Peter and he is still doing all of them save the Reading. I ordered too high of a book for him. I really think he will be able to do CLE. It's a very advanced program and it is definitely not for the slow learner or the student with learning difficulty. It just does not work for Tink or my 4th grade tutor student.
So here I go to research curriculum for a good history program. By the way if you want an excellent history for grades 1 -3 I highly recommend Abeka. It's amazing.
I might resort to living history books for Tink. I'll have to see.
I cant find any good history or Social Studies out there! Yes, we are doing Story of The World but I want Tink doing more. One reason is that if she is reading from a SS book she is getting in extra reading and by doing a workbook I can better see how much she is comprehending what she is reading.
A child like Tink will not read two stories in her Reading book in one day. Her goal is not to learn and to work hard to progress academically. Her goal is to complete the lesson and call it good. So that being the case I have to sneak other reading in by way of other subjects so she doesn't catch on that it is really more of the same!
I pulled her out of the Reading in Christian Light Education and today I bought her the 5th grade Reading through Bob Jones. I pulled her out of the Social Studies through CLE but I don't like Bob Jones History at any level! Its odd cause I love Bob Jones otherwise. I just don't like their History. So it looks like I will have to find something on the Internet. I tell you, I really will write my own someday. You just watch me!
I ordered Social Studies, Reading and Language Arts from CLE for Tink this year. The only things she is still in is LA. I ordered Reading, Language Arts, Science and Bible for Peter and he is still doing all of them save the Reading. I ordered too high of a book for him. I really think he will be able to do CLE. It's a very advanced program and it is definitely not for the slow learner or the student with learning difficulty. It just does not work for Tink or my 4th grade tutor student.
So here I go to research curriculum for a good history program. By the way if you want an excellent history for grades 1 -3 I highly recommend Abeka. It's amazing.
I might resort to living history books for Tink. I'll have to see.
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Homeschooling A Child With Special Needs
The sun slants lazily through the window etching the room in gold. On the desk sits the complete works of Mark Twain, a handsome gilded set of books. A recorder lies on the footstool, carelessly tossed there by nine year old hands. The piano sits under the window it's keys dusty from lack of use.
The room appears to be a schoolroom, for children's books and pencils are everywhere along with puzzles and piles of paper. Bright colored tanagrams are lying in haphazard fashion on the table. Playdoh made by some mama's own hands sits in covered bowls at the tables edge. Rolling pins and dough cutters are tossed about like pick up sticks.
A beautiful oak bookshelf stands at the far left it's shelves loaded with books, children's magazines and crafts. A partially opened drawer in a child's chest reveals bag after bag of foam art. There are bags for every season but none of them seem to have been played with. A peek inside another drawer divulges rows upon rows of tempera paints and every size of brush a young artist could wish for.
Three different art sets sit on top of the chest. They're filled with charcoals, chalks and paints. The paints are cracked and chipped, falling out of their casings, broken by impatient hands.
In the middle of the room is a huge floor puzzle depicting long necked dinosaurs. A child's mosaic lies half finished on a side table. A big comfy leather couch lounges under a painting byMary Cassett. On the arm of the couch appears to be a biography of the artist.
The entire room is a child's dream; a room for learning and crafting, for reading and painting.
I stand in the middle of the room careful not to step on a dinosaur tail. The room is hushed in the late afternoon stillness, but I can still hear the voices of the school day within its walls. I can hear a child screaming and a mother pleading. I can hear pencils breaking and pages being torn. I can hear a little girl mumbling through her reading and shrieking when she misses a word. I can hear her cries as she labors over her sums. A chair is thrown backward as she hurriedly gets up, pounding her fists into her table and loudly declaring that she cannot study.
I see her latest art project torn to shreds in the midst of her frustration. What comes next is soft uncontrollable crying and rocking. I see myself as I hold her and let her cry over her lost art work.
The little girl who's schoolroom this is, is my little girl. The great learning I had anticipated would happen within this room has never taken place. You see my little girl does not process the world around her like other children. She was born with a sensory processing disorder that leaves her world topsy turvy.
People tell me she needs more discipline. Some say she is weird while still others tell me I need to spend more time with her. I try not to say anything. But people know something's not right. The children know. The children say she is cuckoo and stupid.
My child lives in a world where her senses are not integrated enough to tell her what the rest of her body is doing. Can you imagine how it would feel if you...
"could see obstacles in your way, but you could not make your body move the direction you wanted it to to avoid them or your clothes felt like they were made of fiberglass.
You tried to drink a cup of water from a paper cup, only you couldn't tell how hard to squeeze it to hold onto it. So, you squeezed it too hard and the water spilled all over you. The next time you didn't squeeze it hard enough and it fell right through your hands and onto the floor.
Every time you tried to write with your pencil, it broke because you pushed too hard.
The different smells in this room made you utterly nauseous.
The humming of the lights sounded louder than my voice.
You couldn't focus your eyes on me because everything and everyone in the room catches your attention and your eyes just go there instead.
The lights are so bright you have to squint, then you get a pounding headache half way through the presentation
Every time someone touches you, it feels like they are rubbing sandpaper on your skin.
You could only sit here for 15 minutes and then you had to take a run around the building or do 20 jumping jacks so you could sit for another 10 minutes before your muscles felt like they were going to jump out of your skin.
People's whispers sounded like they were yelling.
The tag in the back of your shirt makes you feel as uncomfortable as you would if a spider was crawling on you and you couldn't get him off.
You wanted to write something down but it took you at least 5 seconds to form each letter. You can see the letter in your head, but your hand will not go in the right direction to write it.
You had to pull the car over 3 times on the way to the store because the motion makes you sick."(Through the Eyes of Disfunction)
I had dreams of my daughter becoming a great artist. But my daughter cannot paint. Instead she leaves her brushstrokes on the canvas of her mamas heart. She is painting over the dreams I had for her and in there place a beautiful picture is evolving.
I had dreams of her becoming a famous musician but instead her life is filled with discordant notes in a minor key. I take each note and carefully weave it into the music of our days trying to find a harmony we can live with.
I had dreams of my daughter reclining on the couch devouring great literature and reciting large portions of poetry. But my daughter cannot read past a first grade level. She can not memorize poetry because her short term memory circuits are broken. So although she may never write a book for worldly acclaim every day she is writing a script of love; in rhythms of uneven lines she leaves her print in our hearts and in our home.
When I began to homeschool I thought that I would teach her all I know. Instead she has taught me all that I don't know. Thank you God for this beautiful child you have entrusted to us.
This article has been submitted to The Carnival of Homeschooling.
The room appears to be a schoolroom, for children's books and pencils are everywhere along with puzzles and piles of paper. Bright colored tanagrams are lying in haphazard fashion on the table. Playdoh made by some mama's own hands sits in covered bowls at the tables edge. Rolling pins and dough cutters are tossed about like pick up sticks.
A beautiful oak bookshelf stands at the far left it's shelves loaded with books, children's magazines and crafts. A partially opened drawer in a child's chest reveals bag after bag of foam art. There are bags for every season but none of them seem to have been played with. A peek inside another drawer divulges rows upon rows of tempera paints and every size of brush a young artist could wish for.
Three different art sets sit on top of the chest. They're filled with charcoals, chalks and paints. The paints are cracked and chipped, falling out of their casings, broken by impatient hands.
In the middle of the room is a huge floor puzzle depicting long necked dinosaurs. A child's mosaic lies half finished on a side table. A big comfy leather couch lounges under a painting byMary Cassett. On the arm of the couch appears to be a biography of the artist.
The entire room is a child's dream; a room for learning and crafting, for reading and painting.
I stand in the middle of the room careful not to step on a dinosaur tail. The room is hushed in the late afternoon stillness, but I can still hear the voices of the school day within its walls. I can hear a child screaming and a mother pleading. I can hear pencils breaking and pages being torn. I can hear a little girl mumbling through her reading and shrieking when she misses a word. I can hear her cries as she labors over her sums. A chair is thrown backward as she hurriedly gets up, pounding her fists into her table and loudly declaring that she cannot study.
I see her latest art project torn to shreds in the midst of her frustration. What comes next is soft uncontrollable crying and rocking. I see myself as I hold her and let her cry over her lost art work.
The little girl who's schoolroom this is, is my little girl. The great learning I had anticipated would happen within this room has never taken place. You see my little girl does not process the world around her like other children. She was born with a sensory processing disorder that leaves her world topsy turvy.
People tell me she needs more discipline. Some say she is weird while still others tell me I need to spend more time with her. I try not to say anything. But people know something's not right. The children know. The children say she is cuckoo and stupid.
My child lives in a world where her senses are not integrated enough to tell her what the rest of her body is doing. Can you imagine how it would feel if you...
"could see obstacles in your way, but you could not make your body move the direction you wanted it to to avoid them or your clothes felt like they were made of fiberglass.
You tried to drink a cup of water from a paper cup, only you couldn't tell how hard to squeeze it to hold onto it. So, you squeezed it too hard and the water spilled all over you. The next time you didn't squeeze it hard enough and it fell right through your hands and onto the floor.
Every time you tried to write with your pencil, it broke because you pushed too hard.
The different smells in this room made you utterly nauseous.
The humming of the lights sounded louder than my voice.
You couldn't focus your eyes on me because everything and everyone in the room catches your attention and your eyes just go there instead.
The lights are so bright you have to squint, then you get a pounding headache half way through the presentation
Every time someone touches you, it feels like they are rubbing sandpaper on your skin.
You could only sit here for 15 minutes and then you had to take a run around the building or do 20 jumping jacks so you could sit for another 10 minutes before your muscles felt like they were going to jump out of your skin.
People's whispers sounded like they were yelling.
The tag in the back of your shirt makes you feel as uncomfortable as you would if a spider was crawling on you and you couldn't get him off.
You wanted to write something down but it took you at least 5 seconds to form each letter. You can see the letter in your head, but your hand will not go in the right direction to write it.
You had to pull the car over 3 times on the way to the store because the motion makes you sick."(Through the Eyes of Disfunction)
I had dreams of my daughter becoming a great artist. But my daughter cannot paint. Instead she leaves her brushstrokes on the canvas of her mamas heart. She is painting over the dreams I had for her and in there place a beautiful picture is evolving.
I had dreams of her becoming a famous musician but instead her life is filled with discordant notes in a minor key. I take each note and carefully weave it into the music of our days trying to find a harmony we can live with.
I had dreams of my daughter reclining on the couch devouring great literature and reciting large portions of poetry. But my daughter cannot read past a first grade level. She can not memorize poetry because her short term memory circuits are broken. So although she may never write a book for worldly acclaim every day she is writing a script of love; in rhythms of uneven lines she leaves her print in our hearts and in our home.
When I began to homeschool I thought that I would teach her all I know. Instead she has taught me all that I don't know. Thank you God for this beautiful child you have entrusted to us.
This article has been submitted to The Carnival of Homeschooling.
Thursday, September 7, 2006
Feelings of Failure
The bus just came. I feel like crying. Tink is still in bed. I'm happy about that. But the poor little girl shed some tears into her pillow last night about not returning to school with her friends.
I know what I did was the right thing but it now all feels so scary. It dawns on me that Tinks name is on the classroom door with all her friends. It's sad. What if I cant do the job? What if because of our choices she ends up with no friends or awkward socially...or...or... I'm doubting myself.
Or maybe its not so much that as it is the relinquishing of a dream. I didnt know my daughter would have a sensory disorder. I thought she would go to school like all other kids. Today that yellow school bus pulling out without her was visible proof that my daughter isnt like the other kids. I cant explain it.
I know you all think I should be grateful I can homeschool and yes I am. But there's a reluctance to give up a lifestyle, to give up a dream, to give up a normal way of life to speak.
So many misgivings..so many doubts...
I must keep in focus the reason I have chosen to homeschool. I must remember the little girl who cried after school because her brain hurt or because the kids had called her stupid.
I need your prayers today. I feel like crying every time I turn around. I don't know; it's all so real now.
Now I have no choice but to go file as a homeschooler with the state. No, I haven't done that yet. It's the final stroke that severs Tink from the life she knew.
Oh my, I do not know if I can handle this. Please someone tell me that this is just the first day jitters. I feel so inadequate. I feel so sad. I feel like life as we know it has just ended.
I don't really doubt my ability to teach because I've taught school for years.. it's just the long term impact on Tink that worries me.
Doesnt every child deserve that first day of school in the fall when they discover who their teacher is? Or the excitement of seeing all your old friends or of finding what desk you'll have that year? Isn't that the right of childhood?
God give me strength.
I know what I did was the right thing but it now all feels so scary. It dawns on me that Tinks name is on the classroom door with all her friends. It's sad. What if I cant do the job? What if because of our choices she ends up with no friends or awkward socially...or...or... I'm doubting myself.
Or maybe its not so much that as it is the relinquishing of a dream. I didnt know my daughter would have a sensory disorder. I thought she would go to school like all other kids. Today that yellow school bus pulling out without her was visible proof that my daughter isnt like the other kids. I cant explain it.
I know you all think I should be grateful I can homeschool and yes I am. But there's a reluctance to give up a lifestyle, to give up a dream, to give up a normal way of life to speak.
So many misgivings..so many doubts...
I must keep in focus the reason I have chosen to homeschool. I must remember the little girl who cried after school because her brain hurt or because the kids had called her stupid.
I need your prayers today. I feel like crying every time I turn around. I don't know; it's all so real now.
Now I have no choice but to go file as a homeschooler with the state. No, I haven't done that yet. It's the final stroke that severs Tink from the life she knew.
Oh my, I do not know if I can handle this. Please someone tell me that this is just the first day jitters. I feel so inadequate. I feel so sad. I feel like life as we know it has just ended.
I don't really doubt my ability to teach because I've taught school for years.. it's just the long term impact on Tink that worries me.
Doesnt every child deserve that first day of school in the fall when they discover who their teacher is? Or the excitement of seeing all your old friends or of finding what desk you'll have that year? Isn't that the right of childhood?
God give me strength.
Friday, February 24, 2006
A Child with sensory integration disorder reads
In an never ending quest to find new ways to teach Tink things I have ran into this website; Grammar Zone. You see, it was all over grammar that she had her huge meltdown Friday. Anything that has to do with words is anathema to her. This site has pages on making words plural- the very thing she was screaming about. It also has pages on past tense verbs-another thing we have been working on lately. I'm excited because Tink loves using the computer. There are over 300 grammar pages on that site. So after this she will be doing her grammar online. Hopefully it will save us from another meltdown.
When kids have a sensory disorder, especially when accompanied by ODD, the written rule is to avoid confrontation whenever possible. To this end I had begun letting Tink listen to her reading stories on tape. I would read the story twice and then she would do the workbook. In this manner she never had to come in contact with a direct command from me. But I was also afraid that I would not be able to keep abreast of her reading as well. What if I no longer was able to accurately predict what words she needed to work on? Soooo..I came up with another idea. Now she listens to the taped story then reads it back to me on another tape. She loves recording her reading.
What I didnt expect was the added benefit of listening to her read without promptings from me. This method has given me a much clearer picture of how she reads and where the problem lies. I was amazed at all the power sounds she produces when she reads. Power sounds are a common occurrence in these kids. Before Tinks diagnosis and before being told what it was I truly was beginning to think Tink had Tourettes syndrome.
Here is an example. This is the paragraph Tink is trying to read in her reading book:
Help! Jan called. No one heard. Jan did not dare leave. The hole would grow. The seawater would flood all the land for miles. He could never run quickly enough to get help. He leaned against the dike and waited. The sun set. Above him the stars came out and the moon lit up the fields. Hours passed. But no one came near. Jan nibbbled on Omas bread. He remembered the stories she had told about strong men. They had carried huge rocks to make the dikes strong. They had built them to protect the land. They had battled with the sea. Now Jan would fight too. His finger felt as cold as ice, but he would not let the sea win the battle.
Now here is Tink reading this. I am transcribing from the tape exactly how she reads.
Help! Jan cried. whats he gonna do? I dont know. Actually I do. I do. (smacking noises are heard) hahahahaha (said with short vowel a)
No one heard Jan did not dare leave the hole. Would grow the seawater. Would flood all the land. For miles he could never run quickly through instead to get help, instead to get help, sorry, I need to repeat thaaaat sssssssssssss if your'e thinking I'm reading too slow I'm going to read fast. Five four three two one.
He lend against the dick. And water the sun, w w w watched the sun set. Below him the stars came out and the moon lit. The fields hours passed but no one came near. Jan nibbled on Opas. I'm just going to call it, bread. He remembered the stories she had told about. Strong man they had carried huge rocks to make the dick strong.
They had cuddles bottles they put they, they, took, took, too tootootoo I dont want [sic] read. It's so hard mommy. Page 64 the last line the one two three four five six, 6th word the land. I dont know it so I just skipped it. They had, oh yeah mama, and if um if i skip a word, I'm gonna be skipping, skipped actually I'm going to go like skipping and then keep on reading oKay? So yeah. They had bottled with.
The sea now Jan would fit too hu hu hu hu (these are breathing, grunting, sounds) His finger felt as cold as ice but he would not let the sea win the battle. There's a battle going on? I had nooooo idea. At last the long night..sniff sniff sniff(loud prolonged sniffing noises) the night ended.
So thats the way my daughter reads and that is how she tries to process information coming into her distorted senses. You have just had a peek inside the mind of a child with a sensory disorder. I didnt even pick out the worst parts of the tape. I just started from where I had left off listening to her. Some parts she makes chugging noises like a train. Other parts she adds turkey sounds. It goes beyond anything imaginable. Ive been listening to her read for years now but theres something about hearing it on tape that is so enlightning. I'm going to let the therapist hear this story.
And to think this was a child that the public school system was just going to push on into 4th grade. It makes me angry when I think about it. And imagine the poor kids who have this disorder and are still there.
Yes, the days are long and trying but I have to find the stregth to keep going. My daughter needs me so badly!
When kids have a sensory disorder, especially when accompanied by ODD, the written rule is to avoid confrontation whenever possible. To this end I had begun letting Tink listen to her reading stories on tape. I would read the story twice and then she would do the workbook. In this manner she never had to come in contact with a direct command from me. But I was also afraid that I would not be able to keep abreast of her reading as well. What if I no longer was able to accurately predict what words she needed to work on? Soooo..I came up with another idea. Now she listens to the taped story then reads it back to me on another tape. She loves recording her reading.
What I didnt expect was the added benefit of listening to her read without promptings from me. This method has given me a much clearer picture of how she reads and where the problem lies. I was amazed at all the power sounds she produces when she reads. Power sounds are a common occurrence in these kids. Before Tinks diagnosis and before being told what it was I truly was beginning to think Tink had Tourettes syndrome.
Here is an example. This is the paragraph Tink is trying to read in her reading book:
Help! Jan called. No one heard. Jan did not dare leave. The hole would grow. The seawater would flood all the land for miles. He could never run quickly enough to get help. He leaned against the dike and waited. The sun set. Above him the stars came out and the moon lit up the fields. Hours passed. But no one came near. Jan nibbbled on Omas bread. He remembered the stories she had told about strong men. They had carried huge rocks to make the dikes strong. They had built them to protect the land. They had battled with the sea. Now Jan would fight too. His finger felt as cold as ice, but he would not let the sea win the battle.
Now here is Tink reading this. I am transcribing from the tape exactly how she reads.
Help! Jan cried. whats he gonna do? I dont know. Actually I do. I do. (smacking noises are heard) hahahahaha (said with short vowel a)
No one heard Jan did not dare leave the hole. Would grow the seawater. Would flood all the land. For miles he could never run quickly through instead to get help, instead to get help, sorry, I need to repeat thaaaat sssssssssssss if your'e thinking I'm reading too slow I'm going to read fast. Five four three two one.
He lend against the dick. And water the sun, w w w watched the sun set. Below him the stars came out and the moon lit. The fields hours passed but no one came near. Jan nibbled on Opas. I'm just going to call it, bread. He remembered the stories she had told about. Strong man they had carried huge rocks to make the dick strong.
They had cuddles bottles they put they, they, took, took, too tootootoo I dont want [sic] read. It's so hard mommy. Page 64 the last line the one two three four five six, 6th word the land. I dont know it so I just skipped it. They had, oh yeah mama, and if um if i skip a word, I'm gonna be skipping, skipped actually I'm going to go like skipping and then keep on reading oKay? So yeah. They had bottled with.
The sea now Jan would fit too hu hu hu hu (these are breathing, grunting, sounds) His finger felt as cold as ice but he would not let the sea win the battle. There's a battle going on? I had nooooo idea. At last the long night..sniff sniff sniff(loud prolonged sniffing noises) the night ended.
So thats the way my daughter reads and that is how she tries to process information coming into her distorted senses. You have just had a peek inside the mind of a child with a sensory disorder. I didnt even pick out the worst parts of the tape. I just started from where I had left off listening to her. Some parts she makes chugging noises like a train. Other parts she adds turkey sounds. It goes beyond anything imaginable. Ive been listening to her read for years now but theres something about hearing it on tape that is so enlightning. I'm going to let the therapist hear this story.
And to think this was a child that the public school system was just going to push on into 4th grade. It makes me angry when I think about it. And imagine the poor kids who have this disorder and are still there.
Yes, the days are long and trying but I have to find the stregth to keep going. My daughter needs me so badly!
Thursday, February 23, 2006
Reading for the child with a processing disorder
Ive been lying awake trying to figure out how to cut down on Tinks tantrums during school. We waste so much time handling meltdowns instead of doing schoolwork. It finally hit me that most of her meltdowns could be isolated to one thing. Then this slow thinking mother had a light dawn in her thick skull. Seventy five percent of Tinks meltdowns come when she has to read aloud to me.
Okay, now common sense says that she will have to read out loud at some point so I can tell where she's at in reading. But...I can sneak those read alouds in through other subjects and she wont be quite as aware of whats happening.
I read every story into her tape recorder and have her follow along in the book word for word. I was having her stop and rewind the tape and read again. That proved to be the wrong thing. In the stopping and rewinding Tink could find every reason under the sun to never get back to the second reading; she fiddle with the cord, then mess around with the mic and whine that she'd accidently pushed fast forward and that she needed a drink.
This called for intervention. So instead of having her read and rewind I now just read the story twice giving her time to get back to the begininning page. Every time I turn a page in the story I give her the page number so she never loses the spot.
Yes, I spend a lot of time reading into a tape recorder. But it seems to be working. I then let her go directly to her workbook without reading the story to me. This has totally cut out the reading tantrums.
The poor girl. We go to the library and she brings me all these books she wants to read and I tell her that they're way too hard and she wont be able to read them. It's interesting to note that she's in fourth garde and those are the kinds of books she wants to read. When she brings me a book it's not a first or second grade book at her reading level. It's a fourth to sixth grade book, bless her heart. It shows that her brain is interested in that level of story but the ability to read it is that of a 7 year olds. It breaks my heart.
I finally decided that I cant keep telling her no on these books. She needs to be able to read books at her age level. So now I am letting her bring home the books and I read all of those into a tape too. You may be wondering why I dont just read them to her instead of into a recorder. The reason is twofold; our times dont match up and when she follows a cassette she actually feels like she's doing the reading. In this manner she has done more reading in the last three weeks than she has done in the last three months.
Working with Tink takes continual evaluation of the process. How I would love to just hand her the assigned pages for the day and have her go at it. But no, I spend all day in the shcoolroom with her. Peter's work is done while Tink is listening to her tapes. When I begin school at 9:00 am I know that I wont have a minute to myself until 2:00 pm every day. It's something Ive reconciled myself to.
On top of all the taped readings I'm doing I'm also doing tons of read aloud stuff in the school day. We're still reading The Princess and The Goblin. Oh my, I could go into the disaster on that too but you're probably all bored. Suffice it to say that I learned that Tink needs to have her hands busy duing readings or fights with Peter and general rowdiness follow. So every time we read a book Tink works on something; beads, tanagrams, velvet art, anything that will make her sit still and listen.
I discovered a couple of days ago that Tink doesnt know the majority of the words that end in "le".Whats funny is that by careful listening I can isolate her reading problems. At first it all seems random. But its not! It's the most amazing thing. Last spring I figured out that she was stumbling over every word that had a short vowel followed by a double consonant: happy, bunny, fuzzy. You may recall how I wrote stories to include these words in abundance. Well, now she knows those words and rarely stumbles over that letter pattern.
But now I've found another pattern that she has not grasped. So now we're going over words that end in le. You'd be amazed at how many words that is; terrible, ladle, candle, cuddle, (which by the way has the short vowel double consonant pattern too and one of the few words that she cant read with that pattern, now I know why)struggle (again those two patterns) able, stable, table, kettle,simple, tangle, noodle, battle, beetle, whistle, trouble, ripple, scramble, tentacle, dazzle (again both patterns)...I mean can you see how this would make reading hard? And can you see how the public school could never catch these things?
If any of you are interested in seeing if your child has reading patterns that are tripping him up it's not hard to discover what they are. Just listen to him read a couple of times and write down every word he misses. The patterns become perfectly clear! It's amazing and also exciting.
Now I cant just tell Tink that those words make such and such a sound. I literally have to expose her to every word that ends in le and practice that word. It's a long and ardous process but it works and thats the main thing!
Today we're going on a Field trip with the church academy. We're going to Safarri Sams, a big jungle gym, and letting the kids play. The school asked me to go as a chaperon so that means my kids will get in free. They are so excited!!! So now I msut go make breakfast and get the kids dressed and combed. We have to be out of here in a little over an hour.
Okay, now common sense says that she will have to read out loud at some point so I can tell where she's at in reading. But...I can sneak those read alouds in through other subjects and she wont be quite as aware of whats happening.
I read every story into her tape recorder and have her follow along in the book word for word. I was having her stop and rewind the tape and read again. That proved to be the wrong thing. In the stopping and rewinding Tink could find every reason under the sun to never get back to the second reading; she fiddle with the cord, then mess around with the mic and whine that she'd accidently pushed fast forward and that she needed a drink.
This called for intervention. So instead of having her read and rewind I now just read the story twice giving her time to get back to the begininning page. Every time I turn a page in the story I give her the page number so she never loses the spot.
Yes, I spend a lot of time reading into a tape recorder. But it seems to be working. I then let her go directly to her workbook without reading the story to me. This has totally cut out the reading tantrums.
The poor girl. We go to the library and she brings me all these books she wants to read and I tell her that they're way too hard and she wont be able to read them. It's interesting to note that she's in fourth garde and those are the kinds of books she wants to read. When she brings me a book it's not a first or second grade book at her reading level. It's a fourth to sixth grade book, bless her heart. It shows that her brain is interested in that level of story but the ability to read it is that of a 7 year olds. It breaks my heart.
I finally decided that I cant keep telling her no on these books. She needs to be able to read books at her age level. So now I am letting her bring home the books and I read all of those into a tape too. You may be wondering why I dont just read them to her instead of into a recorder. The reason is twofold; our times dont match up and when she follows a cassette she actually feels like she's doing the reading. In this manner she has done more reading in the last three weeks than she has done in the last three months.
Working with Tink takes continual evaluation of the process. How I would love to just hand her the assigned pages for the day and have her go at it. But no, I spend all day in the shcoolroom with her. Peter's work is done while Tink is listening to her tapes. When I begin school at 9:00 am I know that I wont have a minute to myself until 2:00 pm every day. It's something Ive reconciled myself to.
On top of all the taped readings I'm doing I'm also doing tons of read aloud stuff in the school day. We're still reading The Princess and The Goblin. Oh my, I could go into the disaster on that too but you're probably all bored. Suffice it to say that I learned that Tink needs to have her hands busy duing readings or fights with Peter and general rowdiness follow. So every time we read a book Tink works on something; beads, tanagrams, velvet art, anything that will make her sit still and listen.
I discovered a couple of days ago that Tink doesnt know the majority of the words that end in "le".Whats funny is that by careful listening I can isolate her reading problems. At first it all seems random. But its not! It's the most amazing thing. Last spring I figured out that she was stumbling over every word that had a short vowel followed by a double consonant: happy, bunny, fuzzy. You may recall how I wrote stories to include these words in abundance. Well, now she knows those words and rarely stumbles over that letter pattern.
But now I've found another pattern that she has not grasped. So now we're going over words that end in le. You'd be amazed at how many words that is; terrible, ladle, candle, cuddle, (which by the way has the short vowel double consonant pattern too and one of the few words that she cant read with that pattern, now I know why)struggle (again those two patterns) able, stable, table, kettle,simple, tangle, noodle, battle, beetle, whistle, trouble, ripple, scramble, tentacle, dazzle (again both patterns)...I mean can you see how this would make reading hard? And can you see how the public school could never catch these things?
If any of you are interested in seeing if your child has reading patterns that are tripping him up it's not hard to discover what they are. Just listen to him read a couple of times and write down every word he misses. The patterns become perfectly clear! It's amazing and also exciting.
Now I cant just tell Tink that those words make such and such a sound. I literally have to expose her to every word that ends in le and practice that word. It's a long and ardous process but it works and thats the main thing!
Today we're going on a Field trip with the church academy. We're going to Safarri Sams, a big jungle gym, and letting the kids play. The school asked me to go as a chaperon so that means my kids will get in free. They are so excited!!! So now I msut go make breakfast and get the kids dressed and combed. We have to be out of here in a little over an hour.
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
The Isolation of Homeschool
Im tired; so very tired. I shouldn't even try to blog when I'm so down. So why are my spirits so low you ask? Well because I hate the isolation of homeschooling! I NEED people. If you've read my blog for any length of time you know how badly I need people. So today Tink and Peter had their art and drama classes and I had a wonderful discussion with a very close girlfriend of mine. It was a rainy day and so we sat and visited in the little coffee shop located in the Fine Arts building.
So that should have been sufficient you say. On no! All that did was whetted my appetite for more. I am sleuthing out homeschool groups and classes all over the metro area. I refuse to stay in isolation.
I'm so tired tonight I could just cry. And of all things I don't have a decent tub to soak in. A good bath does wonders for me but the tub in our master bathroom is under construction and the tub upstairs is just plain pitiful in its shallowness and child proofed water temperature thingy that never allows a good HOT bath. The third bathroom doesn't even boast a tub; just a poor pitiful shower. Showers are okay for wake me ups in the morning but they are woefully inadequate as body de-stressors.
Then there's the hottub out on the deck. I'd love to sit in that but its not hooked up. Mercy I'm tired! And then to top it all off I had gained a pound when I stepped on the scale this morning. Well you know what that calls for don't you? That's right! A toasted piece of cinnamon bread with butter and a chocolate chip cookie. That'll teach that scales to move up on me!! How dare it!
My MIl isn't coming tomorrow after all thank God. She woke up with a swollen big toe. I kid you not.
Im so tired.
EDIT
I'm feeling better this morning. I actually think I'll survive. I think a lot of last nights low spirits were due to not being able to find outlets for Tink. She and I had a long talk in which she cried her little eyes out that she didn't have any friends. I am aware of this; acutely aware. She plays with two five year olds here in the neighborhood and other than that she has one good friend. Oh yes she knows more kids her age but she doesn't like them.
Whats more is that she doesn't like a lot of the classes offered for homeschoolers either. She now tells me that she hates it that I signed her up for sewing lessons. She says she wants to finish her lion picture in Art and then quit that and she absolutely never wants to see a drama class again!
Well needless to say she's going to finish all she starts. Drama and Art go until December and she will be there. I may let her out of the sewing class since it hasn't started yet. So the whole point is that she wants friends but she doesn't want anything to do with friends that come in a class! They must be friends to play with not learn with. I tried to explain to her that classes are a way to meet these friends but she didn't want to hear it.
Last night I put out a plea on a yahoo homeschool group I'm on and a lady wrote me and said she'd love to get our girls together and play. She also has a son Peters age. I had met her at Art class but I had no idea she was in the yahoo group with me. Her kids were well behaved but much more shy than mine. Anyway we decided to introduce the kids next Wednesday at class.
It's so hard to find friends and classes that Tink likes. Last night I told her that I would enroll her in any class she wanted. I asked her if she'd like to take violin? NO! what about gymnastics? NO I don't want to do anything that I have to do in front of people! Well then what about a craft class? NO! Would you like to take dance? NO! Cooking classes? NO! Do you want to go back to taikwondo? NO! Would you like to join a book club? NOoooooooo! Oh mama I hate everything you mentioned. The only thing I want to do is take guitar lessons.
Okay so maybe I'll get her guitar lessons. She had a little exposure to guitar in the public school and loved it. The problem is that all the fingering is way too beyond her uncoordinated abilities. But maybe I'll let her try anyway.
So I have a kid that doesn't want to take any classes and doesn't like any of the girls she knows. That leaves quite a dilemma. Oh boy, my brain hurts from thinking about it.
So that should have been sufficient you say. On no! All that did was whetted my appetite for more. I am sleuthing out homeschool groups and classes all over the metro area. I refuse to stay in isolation.
I'm so tired tonight I could just cry. And of all things I don't have a decent tub to soak in. A good bath does wonders for me but the tub in our master bathroom is under construction and the tub upstairs is just plain pitiful in its shallowness and child proofed water temperature thingy that never allows a good HOT bath. The third bathroom doesn't even boast a tub; just a poor pitiful shower. Showers are okay for wake me ups in the morning but they are woefully inadequate as body de-stressors.
Then there's the hottub out on the deck. I'd love to sit in that but its not hooked up. Mercy I'm tired! And then to top it all off I had gained a pound when I stepped on the scale this morning. Well you know what that calls for don't you? That's right! A toasted piece of cinnamon bread with butter and a chocolate chip cookie. That'll teach that scales to move up on me!! How dare it!
My MIl isn't coming tomorrow after all thank God. She woke up with a swollen big toe. I kid you not.
Im so tired.
EDIT
I'm feeling better this morning. I actually think I'll survive. I think a lot of last nights low spirits were due to not being able to find outlets for Tink. She and I had a long talk in which she cried her little eyes out that she didn't have any friends. I am aware of this; acutely aware. She plays with two five year olds here in the neighborhood and other than that she has one good friend. Oh yes she knows more kids her age but she doesn't like them.
Whats more is that she doesn't like a lot of the classes offered for homeschoolers either. She now tells me that she hates it that I signed her up for sewing lessons. She says she wants to finish her lion picture in Art and then quit that and she absolutely never wants to see a drama class again!
Well needless to say she's going to finish all she starts. Drama and Art go until December and she will be there. I may let her out of the sewing class since it hasn't started yet. So the whole point is that she wants friends but she doesn't want anything to do with friends that come in a class! They must be friends to play with not learn with. I tried to explain to her that classes are a way to meet these friends but she didn't want to hear it.
Last night I put out a plea on a yahoo homeschool group I'm on and a lady wrote me and said she'd love to get our girls together and play. She also has a son Peters age. I had met her at Art class but I had no idea she was in the yahoo group with me. Her kids were well behaved but much more shy than mine. Anyway we decided to introduce the kids next Wednesday at class.
It's so hard to find friends and classes that Tink likes. Last night I told her that I would enroll her in any class she wanted. I asked her if she'd like to take violin? NO! what about gymnastics? NO I don't want to do anything that I have to do in front of people! Well then what about a craft class? NO! Would you like to take dance? NO! Cooking classes? NO! Do you want to go back to taikwondo? NO! Would you like to join a book club? NOoooooooo! Oh mama I hate everything you mentioned. The only thing I want to do is take guitar lessons.
Okay so maybe I'll get her guitar lessons. She had a little exposure to guitar in the public school and loved it. The problem is that all the fingering is way too beyond her uncoordinated abilities. But maybe I'll let her try anyway.
So I have a kid that doesn't want to take any classes and doesn't like any of the girls she knows. That leaves quite a dilemma. Oh boy, my brain hurts from thinking about it.
Friday, February 17, 2006
Teaching Reading to a Child with a Processing Disorder
Sometimes I could just scream while trying to teach my daughter how to read. Do you see this pic of a bear? It's a bear. Right? Not a beaver; a bear. Anybody can see it's a bear. 
But Tink insists in reading the word beaver for bear. Even when she has the picture in front of her she says beaver instead of bear. It's so frustrating. Today after the umpteenth time of saying beaver she finally comes to the word and says, bea..no BEAR, so loudly I about jumped out of my chair. I gave a little smile and thought we would continue reading. But no. Tink dissolved into tears crying that I had laughed at her "just like all the public school kids had done"! She cried and she cried. It's amazing what one little misstep can do! It took us a half an hour to start reading again.
She consistently replaces the word when withthen. I mean every time she reads it! And every time I correct it and she reads it like that again. It never ends. Other words she reads entirely backwards. The following sentence took her five trys to get right; When bear woke up he felt something holding his tail. Heres how she read it. I kid you not because I purposely took note: Then beaver woke up and ..left..he left..then beaver woke..beaver woke up he left some thing..then beaver woke up he left something..under..
At this point it takes every bit of self control to not jump out of my chair and go screaming for my room. Quietly I say, "Tink lets start over."
"Then beaver.."
"Tink its WHEN BEAR..."
"Waaaaaa! you told me the word. Now Im not reading anymore because you told me the word. I knew that word...I cant do this..I'm so tired...then she growls like a bear and spits. I reprimand her for the spitting, pull her back up on her chair for by now she is sliding off almost to the floor, and we try again.
And to think that people think I should put her in 4th grade. I want to scream when people tell me that. Hey people, 4th graders are reading major books by now and writing book reports. They know the difference between a bear and a beaver. A two year old can tell you the story is about a bear if there's a big bear on the page. Oh Lord, give me patience and unlimited amounts of tongue-holding forbearance!
We took an extra long lunch break wherein Tink took a nap, did her therapeutic exercises, had her skin brushed by me and ate a peanut butter and banana sandwich. By then it had begun to rain so I put a fire in the stove and the kids made beds in front of it and there in the warmth of the fire we had literature and geography. Tink did her Math after that and we called it a day. These are the reasons I love to homeschool!
The kids took this picture of me reading to them. My chair is right at the bottom of their pink blanket to give you an idea of the room lay out. And hey, do you see my new floor in these pics? We finally got it in and we love it although it's much colder than the carpet was!
This article has been submitted to the Carnival of Homeschooling.
But Tink insists in reading the word beaver for bear. Even when she has the picture in front of her she says beaver instead of bear. It's so frustrating. Today after the umpteenth time of saying beaver she finally comes to the word and says, bea..no BEAR, so loudly I about jumped out of my chair. I gave a little smile and thought we would continue reading. But no. Tink dissolved into tears crying that I had laughed at her "just like all the public school kids had done"! She cried and she cried. It's amazing what one little misstep can do! It took us a half an hour to start reading again. She consistently replaces the word when withthen. I mean every time she reads it! And every time I correct it and she reads it like that again. It never ends. Other words she reads entirely backwards. The following sentence took her five trys to get right; When bear woke up he felt something holding his tail. Heres how she read it. I kid you not because I purposely took note: Then beaver woke up and ..left..he left..then beaver woke..beaver woke up he left some thing..then beaver woke up he left something..under..
At this point it takes every bit of self control to not jump out of my chair and go screaming for my room. Quietly I say, "Tink lets start over."
"Then beaver.."
"Tink its WHEN BEAR..."
"Waaaaaa! you told me the word. Now Im not reading anymore because you told me the word. I knew that word...I cant do this..I'm so tired...then she growls like a bear and spits. I reprimand her for the spitting, pull her back up on her chair for by now she is sliding off almost to the floor, and we try again.
And to think that people think I should put her in 4th grade. I want to scream when people tell me that. Hey people, 4th graders are reading major books by now and writing book reports. They know the difference between a bear and a beaver. A two year old can tell you the story is about a bear if there's a big bear on the page. Oh Lord, give me patience and unlimited amounts of tongue-holding forbearance!
We took an extra long lunch break wherein Tink took a nap, did her therapeutic exercises, had her skin brushed by me and ate a peanut butter and banana sandwich. By then it had begun to rain so I put a fire in the stove and the kids made beds in front of it and there in the warmth of the fire we had literature and geography. Tink did her Math after that and we called it a day. These are the reasons I love to homeschool!
The kids took this picture of me reading to them. My chair is right at the bottom of their pink blanket to give you an idea of the room lay out. And hey, do you see my new floor in these pics? We finally got it in and we love it although it's much colder than the carpet was!This article has been submitted to the Carnival of Homeschooling.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
The Children Find Their Way
There is never any rest for the weary is there now? I'm continually asked where I get all my energy. Well I have no idea what people are talking about because I run on empty most of the time let me tell you! Today I was so tired I like to have keeled over from the sheer weight of all I had to do. The kids sensed my tiredness and didn't want to cooperate. Suddenly Tink was yawning and declaring she wanted a rest. Of course, she was doing school work so no wonder she wanted a rest.
Peter continually begged to be let out of reading class "until I'm older". How funny is that? I about cracked up when he said that. He's reading small words now like Pat, cat, fat, ran, man, pan, etc. It's so exciting to teach a kid to read. Anyway both kids were lounging in their chairs and not excited about school at all today. So we only spent about 2 1/2 hours at our work. I streamlined some of the subjects insomuch that we were able to complete everything but Math even though we had a late start and an early dismissal.
I have this notion that the kids must be kept busy doing something constructive all the time. Now if they're outside playing I don't care what they're doing because just being outside is healthy and wholesome by itself. But in the house I about lose it if I see them lounging around. I'm sure this is a carry over of my girlhood days when any dawdling was quickly met with discipline..well.. if Pop was home it was anyway.
When we were young we worked from morning till night and when we managed to sandwich in play time we still worked! We'd go in the front field and pick blackberries in the heat. Then we'd take them up to our ramshackle barn and slide them through a window where the sister inside would pretend to weigh them and we'd pretend to pay her in return. Then off to our dolls to pretend to process the berries. Why didn't we just sit under a shade tree, for pity sake?
I do remember one summer when my sister Gwen and I spent every free minute lounging in lawn chairs on the front lawn reading the Trixie Belden books. I precisely remember feeling like "other people" while I read in the hot sun, crossing my legs and dangling my foot off to the side of my leg. What can I say? I lived in lala land most of my childhood, always trying to be the character in whatever book I was reading at the time. I was a weird one to be sure.
But anyway because of my work ethic I have a huge problem with seeing my kids in activities that are less than constructive. I'm happy to report that the kids seem to be getting better at remaining self employed when I'm not there to direct them. The last week they have made lots of things with perler beads. The only problem is that they want me to iron their creations immediately after they make them but that too I can tolerate. At least they're making and doing something.
Peter has been playing a lot with his magnetix. I'm bummed though because I spent ten bucks on a tiny little set of magnetix only to discover that you can buy bags of them at the dollar store! They're not quite the same quality but they're magnets so who cares?
Peter has also discovered that he can put together harder puzzles than he originally supposed he could. I have him do puzzles as part of his school work and you should see how proud he is of himself when he completes a hard one that only Tink could do originally.
And believe it or not I've finally found a book Tink loves. For the first time in her life she is asking me to read to her. So what is this book that has so captured the child? None other than the old children's classic The Princess and the Goblin! I'm so happy I could cry. It's the book I've been reading to her during literature class. We're reading Heidi for our supplemental reading and she's not quite as excited about that one. Even Peter sits in on Lit and listens to the story of the Princess. When Tink narrates Peter corrects her. She hates it and I'm not sure how to handle it. Tinks comprehension is so low that although Peter is four years younger he comprehends more than she does.
He listened fascinated today while I read about James Watt inventing the steam engine. It was Tinks science class but he was all ears. When narration came he immediately pops up with the fact that the man had invented Thomas the Train. Boy did Tink scoff. So I had to assure Peter that in many ways Watt did invent Thomas the steam engine. Kids do say the darndest things. I decided today though that I'll have to get an easier Science book for Tink. We're using The Story of Inventions and even though it's geared for her age it's just going over her head.
So the fall days come and go and life moves on. I love these days with my kids even though my days are full and stuffed to the brim with energy sapping activities. I guess the only other alternative would be to sit in the chair and rot so I may as well stay busy and thank God I have the health to do so.
Peter continually begged to be let out of reading class "until I'm older". How funny is that? I about cracked up when he said that. He's reading small words now like Pat, cat, fat, ran, man, pan, etc. It's so exciting to teach a kid to read. Anyway both kids were lounging in their chairs and not excited about school at all today. So we only spent about 2 1/2 hours at our work. I streamlined some of the subjects insomuch that we were able to complete everything but Math even though we had a late start and an early dismissal.
I have this notion that the kids must be kept busy doing something constructive all the time. Now if they're outside playing I don't care what they're doing because just being outside is healthy and wholesome by itself. But in the house I about lose it if I see them lounging around. I'm sure this is a carry over of my girlhood days when any dawdling was quickly met with discipline..well.. if Pop was home it was anyway.
When we were young we worked from morning till night and when we managed to sandwich in play time we still worked! We'd go in the front field and pick blackberries in the heat. Then we'd take them up to our ramshackle barn and slide them through a window where the sister inside would pretend to weigh them and we'd pretend to pay her in return. Then off to our dolls to pretend to process the berries. Why didn't we just sit under a shade tree, for pity sake?
I do remember one summer when my sister Gwen and I spent every free minute lounging in lawn chairs on the front lawn reading the Trixie Belden books. I precisely remember feeling like "other people" while I read in the hot sun, crossing my legs and dangling my foot off to the side of my leg. What can I say? I lived in lala land most of my childhood, always trying to be the character in whatever book I was reading at the time. I was a weird one to be sure.
But anyway because of my work ethic I have a huge problem with seeing my kids in activities that are less than constructive. I'm happy to report that the kids seem to be getting better at remaining self employed when I'm not there to direct them. The last week they have made lots of things with perler beads. The only problem is that they want me to iron their creations immediately after they make them but that too I can tolerate. At least they're making and doing something.
Peter has been playing a lot with his magnetix. I'm bummed though because I spent ten bucks on a tiny little set of magnetix only to discover that you can buy bags of them at the dollar store! They're not quite the same quality but they're magnets so who cares?
Peter has also discovered that he can put together harder puzzles than he originally supposed he could. I have him do puzzles as part of his school work and you should see how proud he is of himself when he completes a hard one that only Tink could do originally.
And believe it or not I've finally found a book Tink loves. For the first time in her life she is asking me to read to her. So what is this book that has so captured the child? None other than the old children's classic The Princess and the Goblin! I'm so happy I could cry. It's the book I've been reading to her during literature class. We're reading Heidi for our supplemental reading and she's not quite as excited about that one. Even Peter sits in on Lit and listens to the story of the Princess. When Tink narrates Peter corrects her. She hates it and I'm not sure how to handle it. Tinks comprehension is so low that although Peter is four years younger he comprehends more than she does.
He listened fascinated today while I read about James Watt inventing the steam engine. It was Tinks science class but he was all ears. When narration came he immediately pops up with the fact that the man had invented Thomas the Train. Boy did Tink scoff. So I had to assure Peter that in many ways Watt did invent Thomas the steam engine. Kids do say the darndest things. I decided today though that I'll have to get an easier Science book for Tink. We're using The Story of Inventions and even though it's geared for her age it's just going over her head.
So the fall days come and go and life moves on. I love these days with my kids even though my days are full and stuffed to the brim with energy sapping activities. I guess the only other alternative would be to sit in the chair and rot so I may as well stay busy and thank God I have the health to do so.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
The Purple Cow
Home educating Tink is a continual battle. Tink has been diagnosed with a sensory integration disorder. She is 9 years old and in the 4th grade. Life is not easy for these children. Tink is reading at a beginning 2nd grade level and is highly resistant to schooling in any form. I started homeschooling her this past March when nothing else seemed to be working. Some days I think she's coming along nicely then for no reason known to man she loses it. I'm learning a lot through the nuero therapeutics and the methods have helped tremendously. But the battle still goes on.
The most amazing thing is how swiftly a class can deteriorate. So we're reading along and Tink comes to a word she doesn't know. I help her with the word and all seems well. She reads two more words and suddenly without warning her head is on the table and she's crying her eyes out. "I didn't want you to help me with that word. Waaaa!"
She slides out of her chair to her own surprise and quickly rights herself. She' s growing hysterical,"I hate reading. I never will like reading. You told me the word. I don't want help. She bangs her book on the table. Don't talk to me. I don't want to listen. My head hurts. Just let me read my own way."
I try to explain to her that her way makes it unable for her to understand the story.
You can only mix up the words of and for and when and then and that and what a few times and skip every other word in between before the story makes no sense whatsoever. Tink so consistently mixes the examples above that I know for a fact she has totally learned them this way at the public school and nobody has caught it.
So she screams and whimpers and screams and slides under the table and plugs her ears refusing to listen and hums to herself while she rocks until my patience about wears thin.
I dare not let her know I'm frustrated or she will feed off of it and we'll get nowhere. The best thing I can do is leave the room with the order for her to finish the page while I do a five minute chore. When I come back she's usually got it done. She calms down and we move to the next thing .
Some times I can go through five or six different things until she shows an interest. Today it was a paper on punctuation. She saw it and started squirrming in her chair and chewing on her chewy as fast as she could. I quickly replaced the paper with one on nouns. She leaned forward earnestly looking at it while chewing. Suddenly she jumps back as if she's been bitten and starts to scream.
I calmly tell her to set her chair upright while at the same time reaching for a book of poems. She wiggles and wiggles and slides around on her chair but never quits eyeing the book. The poems are actually old nursery rhymes and they're one of the ways that children are taught reading fluency.
I ignore the wiggling and read the poem aloud to myself. At the end the author of the book writes the origins to the poem. I read Humpty Dumpty. Tink chews and wiggles but doesn't scream. "Hmm, I say, now isn't this interesting. Humpty dumpty was actually a cannon place on a wall during the war. It fell off and the kings men tried to fix it but never could. Isn't that funny? I really thought all these years it was an egg."
"Who cares about the stupid cannon! I hate this poem. I hate all poems," she shouts. "Poems are stupid. Words are stupid." She plugs her ears and screams.
"Oh, here's a good one," I say ignoring the fact that she's again about to disappear under the table. "Hey diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle, the cow...."
"Stop," she screams you read that one to me last week. "I never want to hear it again."
I had to think for a minute. Indeed I had read it to her last week but she was under the table screaming. I didn't think she had even heard it.
I went on as if I hadn't been interrupted."Oh, look Tink, I loved this one when I was a kid. I still do actually. This guy wrote about a purple cow and later he hated is so badly that..."
"Cows aren't purple. What a stupid, STUPID poem." She was sliding back up in her chair. She bent over and looked at the poem.
"Yeh," I said, "He knew it was a silly poem. Later he got so mad at hearing everyone quoting it that he said he'd kill them if he heard it again."
Tinks leans over the book like a little old lady with poor eyesight. She's vigorously chewing her chewy. I let her silently read the poem. She doesn't get far before she says, "What did he say? Why did he want to kill them?"
"Well lets see what it says," I say matter of factly. " Read it with me." She begins reading the poem with me. She stays with me all the way to the end then laughs."That is a stupid poem."
Score one for ole mom. I made it through that hurdle. Math is next but I'll spare you. It goes the exact same way as reading. It's really all a very intricate dance. By the way if you're wondering about her use of the word stupid it's just a battle I'm not going to face right now. Eventually we're going to deal with it in behavorial therapy.
Later that day I overheard Tink telling her dad in animated tones. "Daddy did you know humpty dumpty was actually a gun. It fell off a wall and broke. And you know what? I read a really silly poem about a purple cow." Mr. Darling discusses it all with her and they actually have an "intellectual" talk. Sure it only lasted five minutes. But it was initiated by Tink! What a huge milestone. AND...Tink truly did enjoy the poetry. I was walking on air!
Tink not only heard the poem she understood it! This had to be one of my best homeschooling moments.
This is my entry to win a camera in the "Capture the Educational Moment" Contest sponsored by Spunky and Academic Superstore.
The most amazing thing is how swiftly a class can deteriorate. So we're reading along and Tink comes to a word she doesn't know. I help her with the word and all seems well. She reads two more words and suddenly without warning her head is on the table and she's crying her eyes out. "I didn't want you to help me with that word. Waaaa!"
She slides out of her chair to her own surprise and quickly rights herself. She' s growing hysterical,"I hate reading. I never will like reading. You told me the word. I don't want help. She bangs her book on the table. Don't talk to me. I don't want to listen. My head hurts. Just let me read my own way."
I try to explain to her that her way makes it unable for her to understand the story.
You can only mix up the words of and for and when and then and that and what a few times and skip every other word in between before the story makes no sense whatsoever. Tink so consistently mixes the examples above that I know for a fact she has totally learned them this way at the public school and nobody has caught it.
So she screams and whimpers and screams and slides under the table and plugs her ears refusing to listen and hums to herself while she rocks until my patience about wears thin.
I dare not let her know I'm frustrated or she will feed off of it and we'll get nowhere. The best thing I can do is leave the room with the order for her to finish the page while I do a five minute chore. When I come back she's usually got it done. She calms down and we move to the next thing .
Some times I can go through five or six different things until she shows an interest. Today it was a paper on punctuation. She saw it and started squirrming in her chair and chewing on her chewy as fast as she could. I quickly replaced the paper with one on nouns. She leaned forward earnestly looking at it while chewing. Suddenly she jumps back as if she's been bitten and starts to scream.
I calmly tell her to set her chair upright while at the same time reaching for a book of poems. She wiggles and wiggles and slides around on her chair but never quits eyeing the book. The poems are actually old nursery rhymes and they're one of the ways that children are taught reading fluency.
I ignore the wiggling and read the poem aloud to myself. At the end the author of the book writes the origins to the poem. I read Humpty Dumpty. Tink chews and wiggles but doesn't scream. "Hmm, I say, now isn't this interesting. Humpty dumpty was actually a cannon place on a wall during the war. It fell off and the kings men tried to fix it but never could. Isn't that funny? I really thought all these years it was an egg."
"Who cares about the stupid cannon! I hate this poem. I hate all poems," she shouts. "Poems are stupid. Words are stupid." She plugs her ears and screams.
"Oh, here's a good one," I say ignoring the fact that she's again about to disappear under the table. "Hey diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle, the cow...."
"Stop," she screams you read that one to me last week. "I never want to hear it again."
I had to think for a minute. Indeed I had read it to her last week but she was under the table screaming. I didn't think she had even heard it.
I went on as if I hadn't been interrupted."Oh, look Tink, I loved this one when I was a kid. I still do actually. This guy wrote about a purple cow and later he hated is so badly that..."
"Cows aren't purple. What a stupid, STUPID poem." She was sliding back up in her chair. She bent over and looked at the poem.
"Yeh," I said, "He knew it was a silly poem. Later he got so mad at hearing everyone quoting it that he said he'd kill them if he heard it again."
Tinks leans over the book like a little old lady with poor eyesight. She's vigorously chewing her chewy. I let her silently read the poem. She doesn't get far before she says, "What did he say? Why did he want to kill them?"
"Well lets see what it says," I say matter of factly. " Read it with me." She begins reading the poem with me. She stays with me all the way to the end then laughs."That is a stupid poem."
Score one for ole mom. I made it through that hurdle. Math is next but I'll spare you. It goes the exact same way as reading. It's really all a very intricate dance. By the way if you're wondering about her use of the word stupid it's just a battle I'm not going to face right now. Eventually we're going to deal with it in behavorial therapy.
Later that day I overheard Tink telling her dad in animated tones. "Daddy did you know humpty dumpty was actually a gun. It fell off a wall and broke. And you know what? I read a really silly poem about a purple cow." Mr. Darling discusses it all with her and they actually have an "intellectual" talk. Sure it only lasted five minutes. But it was initiated by Tink! What a huge milestone. AND...Tink truly did enjoy the poetry. I was walking on air!
Tink not only heard the poem she understood it! This had to be one of my best homeschooling moments.
This is my entry to win a camera in the "Capture the Educational Moment" Contest sponsored by Spunky and Academic Superstore.
Thursday, February 9, 2006
Homeschooling a Child With Special Needs
The sun slants lazily through the window etching the room in gold. On the desk sits the complete works of Mark Twain, a handsome gilded set of books. A recorder lies on the footstool, carelessly tossed there by nine year old hands. The piano sits under the window it's keys dusty from lack of use.
The room appears to be a schoolroom, for children's books and pencils are everywhere along with puzzles and piles of paper. Bright colored tanagrams are lying in haphazard fashion on the table. Playdoh made by some mama's own hands sits in covered bowls at the tables edge. Rolling pins and dough cutters are tossed about like pick up sticks.
A beautiful oak bookshelf stands at the far left it's shelves loaded with books, children's magazines and crafts. A partially opened drawer in a child's chest reveals bag after bag of foam art. There are bags for every season but none of them seem to have been played with. A peek inside another drawer divulges rows upon rows of tempera paints and every size of brush a young artist could wish for.
Three different art sets sit on top of the chest. They're filled with charcoals, chalks and paints. The paints are cracked and chipped, falling out of their casings, broken by impatient hands.
In the middle of the room is a huge floor puzzle depicting long necked dinosaurs. A child's mosaic lies half finished on a side table. A big comfy leather couch lounges under a painting byMary Cassett. On the arm of the couch appears to be a biography of the artist.
The entire room is a child's dream; a room for learning and crafting, for reading and painting.
I stand in the middle of the room careful not to step on a dinosaur tail. The room is hushed in the late afternoon stillness, but I can still hear the voices of the school day within its walls. I can hear a child screaming and a mother pleading. I can hear pencils breaking and pages being torn. I can hear a little girl mumbling through her reading and shrieking when she misses a word. I can hear her cries as she labors over her sums. A chair is thrown backward as she hurriedly gets up, pounding her fists into her table and loudly declaring that she cannot study.
I see her latest art project torn to shreds in the midst of her frustration. What comes next is soft uncontrollable crying and rocking. I see myself as I hold her and let her cry over her lost art work.
The little girl who's schoolroom this is, is my little girl. The great learning I had anticipated would happen within this room has never taken place. You see my little girl does not process the world around her like other children. She was born with a sensory processing disorder that leaves her world topsy turvy.
People tell me she needs more discipline. Some say she is weird while still others tell me I need to spend more time with her. I try not to say anything. But people know something's not right. The children know. The children say she is cuckoo and stupid.
My child lives in a world where her senses are not integrated enough to tell her what the rest of her body is doing. Can you imagine how it would feel if you...
"could see obstacles in your way, but you could not make your body move the direction you wanted it to to avoid them or your clothes felt like they were made of fiberglass.
You tried to drink a cup of water from a paper cup, only you couldn't tell how hard to squeeze it to hold onto it. So, you squeezed it too hard and the water spilled all over you. The next time you didn't squeeze it hard enough and it fell right through your hands and onto the floor.
Every time you tried to write with your pencil, it broke because you pushed too hard.
The different smells in this room made you utterly nauseous.
The humming of the lights sounded louder than my voice.
You couldn't focus your eyes on me because everything and everyone in the room catches your attention and your eyes just go there instead.
The lights are so bright you have to squint, then you get a pounding headache half way through the presentation
Every time someone touches you, it feels like they are rubbing sandpaper on your skin.
You could only sit here for 15 minutes and then you had to take a run around the building or do 20 jumping jacks so you could sit for another 10 minutes before your muscles felt like they were going to jump out of your skin.
People's whispers sounded like they were yelling.
The tag in the back of your shirt makes you feel as uncomfortable as you would if a spider was crawling on you and you couldn't get him off.
You wanted to write something down but it took you at least 5 seconds to form each letter. You can see the letter in your head, but your hand will not go in the right direction to write it.
You had to pull the car over 3 times on the way to the store because the motion makes you sick."(Through the Eyes of Disfunction)
I had dreams of my daughter becoming a great artist. But my daughter cannot paint. Instead she leaves her brushstrokes on the canvas of her mamas heart. She is painting over the dreams I had for her and in there place a beautiful picture is evolving.
I had dreams of her becoming a famous musician but instead her life is filled with discordant notes in a minor key. I take each note and carefully weave it into the music of our days trying to find a harmony we can live with.
I had dreams of my daughter reclining on the couch devouring great literature and reciting large portions of poetry. But my daughter cannot read past a first grade level. She can not memorize poetry because her short term memory circuits are broken. So although she may never write a book for worldly acclaim every day she is writing a script of love; in rhythms of uneven lines she leaves her print in our hearts and in our home.
When I began to homeschool I thought that I would teach her all I know. Instead she has taught me all that I don't know. Thank you God for this beautiful child you have entrusted to us.
This article has been submitted to The Carnival of Homeschooling.
The room appears to be a schoolroom, for children's books and pencils are everywhere along with puzzles and piles of paper. Bright colored tanagrams are lying in haphazard fashion on the table. Playdoh made by some mama's own hands sits in covered bowls at the tables edge. Rolling pins and dough cutters are tossed about like pick up sticks.
A beautiful oak bookshelf stands at the far left it's shelves loaded with books, children's magazines and crafts. A partially opened drawer in a child's chest reveals bag after bag of foam art. There are bags for every season but none of them seem to have been played with. A peek inside another drawer divulges rows upon rows of tempera paints and every size of brush a young artist could wish for.
Three different art sets sit on top of the chest. They're filled with charcoals, chalks and paints. The paints are cracked and chipped, falling out of their casings, broken by impatient hands.
In the middle of the room is a huge floor puzzle depicting long necked dinosaurs. A child's mosaic lies half finished on a side table. A big comfy leather couch lounges under a painting byMary Cassett. On the arm of the couch appears to be a biography of the artist.
The entire room is a child's dream; a room for learning and crafting, for reading and painting.
I stand in the middle of the room careful not to step on a dinosaur tail. The room is hushed in the late afternoon stillness, but I can still hear the voices of the school day within its walls. I can hear a child screaming and a mother pleading. I can hear pencils breaking and pages being torn. I can hear a little girl mumbling through her reading and shrieking when she misses a word. I can hear her cries as she labors over her sums. A chair is thrown backward as she hurriedly gets up, pounding her fists into her table and loudly declaring that she cannot study.
I see her latest art project torn to shreds in the midst of her frustration. What comes next is soft uncontrollable crying and rocking. I see myself as I hold her and let her cry over her lost art work.
The little girl who's schoolroom this is, is my little girl. The great learning I had anticipated would happen within this room has never taken place. You see my little girl does not process the world around her like other children. She was born with a sensory processing disorder that leaves her world topsy turvy.
People tell me she needs more discipline. Some say she is weird while still others tell me I need to spend more time with her. I try not to say anything. But people know something's not right. The children know. The children say she is cuckoo and stupid.
My child lives in a world where her senses are not integrated enough to tell her what the rest of her body is doing. Can you imagine how it would feel if you...
"could see obstacles in your way, but you could not make your body move the direction you wanted it to to avoid them or your clothes felt like they were made of fiberglass.
You tried to drink a cup of water from a paper cup, only you couldn't tell how hard to squeeze it to hold onto it. So, you squeezed it too hard and the water spilled all over you. The next time you didn't squeeze it hard enough and it fell right through your hands and onto the floor.
Every time you tried to write with your pencil, it broke because you pushed too hard.
The different smells in this room made you utterly nauseous.
The humming of the lights sounded louder than my voice.
You couldn't focus your eyes on me because everything and everyone in the room catches your attention and your eyes just go there instead.
The lights are so bright you have to squint, then you get a pounding headache half way through the presentation
Every time someone touches you, it feels like they are rubbing sandpaper on your skin.
You could only sit here for 15 minutes and then you had to take a run around the building or do 20 jumping jacks so you could sit for another 10 minutes before your muscles felt like they were going to jump out of your skin.
People's whispers sounded like they were yelling.
The tag in the back of your shirt makes you feel as uncomfortable as you would if a spider was crawling on you and you couldn't get him off.
You wanted to write something down but it took you at least 5 seconds to form each letter. You can see the letter in your head, but your hand will not go in the right direction to write it.
You had to pull the car over 3 times on the way to the store because the motion makes you sick."(Through the Eyes of Disfunction)
I had dreams of my daughter becoming a great artist. But my daughter cannot paint. Instead she leaves her brushstrokes on the canvas of her mamas heart. She is painting over the dreams I had for her and in there place a beautiful picture is evolving.
I had dreams of her becoming a famous musician but instead her life is filled with discordant notes in a minor key. I take each note and carefully weave it into the music of our days trying to find a harmony we can live with.
I had dreams of my daughter reclining on the couch devouring great literature and reciting large portions of poetry. But my daughter cannot read past a first grade level. She can not memorize poetry because her short term memory circuits are broken. So although she may never write a book for worldly acclaim every day she is writing a script of love; in rhythms of uneven lines she leaves her print in our hearts and in our home.
When I began to homeschool I thought that I would teach her all I know. Instead she has taught me all that I don't know. Thank you God for this beautiful child you have entrusted to us.
This article has been submitted to The Carnival of Homeschooling.
Wednesday, February 8, 2006
I signed the kids up at the Fine Arts Academy and then went to the library. I used to have the complete Hiedi series and now I cant find any of the books. So I found one at the library. I'm going to use it for supplemental reading for Tink. Every day I have to go through it and figure out what parts I'm going to read though. There is no way Tink is going to listen to all the fill in stuff like the conversation between Aunt Dete and the towns people when she's taking Hiedi to the grandfather. When I think of how I devoured books as a kid I just want to cry that Tink wont do the same.
I've explained to her that reading a book is like traveling and living with the characters. I've told her all the fun things you get to do when you read. She looks at me like I've grown two heads.
And speaking of books I just have to tell you about this wonderful resource I found through ambleside. The Baldwin Online Childrens Literature Project...Bringing Yesterdays Classic to Todays Kids. Volunteers have offered to retype entire books for our use. You can print out chapters and use them in your homeschool or just your reading time with the kids. They have books like The Tanglewood Secret, Parables From Nature, The Princess and the Goblin etc. You must go check it out. There are literally scores of books there.
I've been very pleased at the learning that has gone on in this house lately. Peter watched the Letter Family video by Leap Frog three times yesterday. Earlier in the day when I drilled him on letter recognition there were 10 of the 26 letters he couldn't name. Now the cards were both lower case and upper case together. If I separated them I don't know how many letters he would know out of the 52. When Tink went to public school Kindergarten she was tested the first day and only knew seven of the 52. Now knowing how hard it is for her to remember anything I'm proud that she got the seven. But back then I was horrified.
Both kids have been spending quite a bit of time with the tanagrams set and the pattern boards. I'm pleased t see Tink sitting on the floor figuring out the patterns. Yesterday was such a balmy day that we only had school for about two hours. Tink flew through her work without any crying or resistance! That's the very first day since pulling her out of public school last spring that she has gone that long without a meltdown in homeschool.
I let the kids out for break at 10:30 and it wasn't long until she came in the house with the neighbor girl,
who's school hasn't started yet, and grabbed her art book and her paints, informing me that she was going to paint a butterfly in the grass. I stopped in my tracks. She was doing nature journaling and didn't even know it. No way was I going to stop her. I helped her get her art stuff together and off she went. She played outside all afternoon so I just let it be. There will be plenty of rainy days ahead. She's so incredibly proud of this butterfly, it's sweet to see.
I've explained to her that reading a book is like traveling and living with the characters. I've told her all the fun things you get to do when you read. She looks at me like I've grown two heads.
And speaking of books I just have to tell you about this wonderful resource I found through ambleside. The Baldwin Online Childrens Literature Project...Bringing Yesterdays Classic to Todays Kids. Volunteers have offered to retype entire books for our use. You can print out chapters and use them in your homeschool or just your reading time with the kids. They have books like The Tanglewood Secret, Parables From Nature, The Princess and the Goblin etc. You must go check it out. There are literally scores of books there.
I've been very pleased at the learning that has gone on in this house lately. Peter watched the Letter Family video by Leap Frog three times yesterday. Earlier in the day when I drilled him on letter recognition there were 10 of the 26 letters he couldn't name. Now the cards were both lower case and upper case together. If I separated them I don't know how many letters he would know out of the 52. When Tink went to public school Kindergarten she was tested the first day and only knew seven of the 52. Now knowing how hard it is for her to remember anything I'm proud that she got the seven. But back then I was horrified.
Both kids have been spending quite a bit of time with the tanagrams set and the pattern boards. I'm pleased t see Tink sitting on the floor figuring out the patterns. Yesterday was such a balmy day that we only had school for about two hours. Tink flew through her work without any crying or resistance! That's the very first day since pulling her out of public school last spring that she has gone that long without a meltdown in homeschool.
I let the kids out for break at 10:30 and it wasn't long until she came in the house with the neighbor girl,
who's school hasn't started yet, and grabbed her art book and her paints, informing me that she was going to paint a butterfly in the grass. I stopped in my tracks. She was doing nature journaling and didn't even know it. No way was I going to stop her. I helped her get her art stuff together and off she went. She played outside all afternoon so I just let it be. There will be plenty of rainy days ahead. She's so incredibly proud of this butterfly, it's sweet to see.
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